It's a difficult thing to reconcile what goes on in my head. It can't just be me but who knows.

To expect the best but also just accept that's how it is.

To fight with what you want to do and what you should do.

To want to cry at your own frustration or to tell yourself to suck it up because you're being a child.

I feel like I'm saying things and no one hears me, but I know that's not true. Someone else's experience doesn't invalidate mine. That's how it is for everyone's narrative though, so it doesn't make it a different feeling from everyone else's emotions. I've always said I was selfish, but when you haven't practiced how you say... an unarticulated thought is worth[ ]less than an articulated one.

But look, I just did it, splitting myself up again.

Then again, that's just how it is.